Crossing The Threshold

Sylvia Plath's, The Bell Jar, ends in a powerful yet uncertain scene where Esther Greenwood is crossing an imaginary threshold that determines whether or not she is qualified to leave the asylum. Not only is she consumed by fear, but also by the likelihood that she won’t be able to be let out. This moment holds all that she has experienced and has yet to discover.

Throughout the novel, Esther undergoes a whirlwind of emotions from the moment she stepped into New York City for her summer internship, to her last possible moments at the Belsize asylum. Through her ups and downs, she finds herself annoyed by society's standards pushing her to be someone she is not. In New York, she felt pressured to be the stereotypical teenage girl that goes to parties and drinks. At home in Massachusetts, she was expected to be the perfect, accomplished daughter that followed societal expectations and wrote in shorthand to showcase the intelligence that she was expected to have. The pressure she felt eventually caused her to spiral and fall into a deep state of depression which set the scene for the experiences that we witness, as she goes in and out of mental hospitals. Little did she know that these events would ultimately define her growth and shape the person that she would become.


A key moment in Esther's journey was when she was at the beach with Jody, Jody's boyfriend, and Cal. Cal talks about a play where a young man finds out that he has a brain disease, and his mom debates whether or not she should kill him. For the most part, Esther isn't paying attention until the question of how the mom would kill her son suddenly comes to her mind. “‘What was she going to kill him with? I forgot.’” she asks. “I hadn't forgotten. I remembered perfectly well, but I wanted to hear what Cal would say.” He says Morphia powders which are no longer available in America. She goes on to ask Cal how he would kill himself, if he ever wanted to do it. Their gruesome conversation leaves Esther curious… and impulsive. She wanders into the water as she contemplates ending her life. As her body fully dives into the water, she comes back up and repeats to herself, “I am, I am, I am.” At this moment, she acknowledges her own existence and realizes that she is still alive. This symbolizes her sense of clarity and resilience, despite her struggles with mental health.

This powerful moment of Esther at the beach sets the foundation for her slow, yet progressive improvement following months at the asylum. After her second round of electric shock therapy with Dr. Nolan, Esther feels a sense of peace and comfort, as if the bell jar has lifted, allowing her to breathe. “All the heat and fear had purged itself. I felt surprisingly at peace. The bell jar hung, suspended, a few feet above my head. I was open to the circulating air.” This jar, once sealed tight around her with no room to breathe, was now lifted over her head giving her a sudden feeling of relief, allowing her to separate herself and her abilities from her illness. This feeling of temporary comfort gave Esther the reassurance that her sickness is not inescapable and with the right support system, like Dr. Nolan, she can slowly start to regain control of her emotions.

In these small, yet pivotal moments, Esther was able to envision a life beyond her current circumstances and the suffocation of the bell jar. By the time she stood outside of the interview room, she was no longer the same person that she was walking into the asylum, feeling trapped beneath a bell jar. Her journey through hopelessnesses, survival, recovery, and acceptance allowed her to see herself for more than just her illness. She was now able to see those experiences as a part of something that defines her rather than something that confines her. Crossing this threshold was not just about leaving the asylum, it was about stepping into a new version of herself that she accepted, embraced, and gave her the strength to say “I am, I am, I am.”